Aug 30 2007

The HouseHusband – A New Step In The Evolution Of Males?

Published by at 7:34 am under Philosophy

Let’s get something straight right from the beginning … the House Husband (Homo Domesticus) is not just a man taking on the traditional woman’s role of housekeeping duties and looking after a bunch of screaming kids at home.

We’re an advanced species, evolved from the old industrial-age male!

True, we’re expected to manage the home and look after the kids while our wife or partner goes off to battle long traffic queues on their way to a job that will bring home the bacon, but the way we do things is much more smarter. We look for ways to do things efficiently around the house, so that we still have time to conquer and rule the world in the time between dropping the kids off at school in the morning, and picking them up again in the afternoon.

So, who is this new male called a househusband, or stay-at-home dad?

Wikipedia describes a stay-at-home dad as a male parent who is the main carer of the children and the home. Alternative terms include stay at home father, househusband or homemaker.

I prefer to think of the role as an opportunity for many men around the world to create an ideal lifestyle, blending parenting, home manager and work-at-home business owner with married life in a balanced and less stressful way.

Of course, you don’t have to be married to be a househusband. You can be in a de facto relationship, or just living with someone. You don’t even have to have children. Also, with expanded gay rights, we have seen an increase in same-sex or LGBT adoption (the adoption of children by lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgendered people), with some males choosing to stay at home and look after the children while their partner goes to work.

We’re moving further and further away from traditional gender roles that gave the primary parental responsibility to the housewife. With the increasing equality given to women in many parts of the world, a reversal of traditional roles has allowed women’s careers to take precedence in a marriage, so they can become the primary breadwinner of the family.

In my particular case, for example, when my last business consulting contract came to an end just as our youngest child started weaning off his mother’s breast, my wife and I discussed our options and it became quite apparent that if she could get back into the IT world after taking eight years off to raise our three young boys, she could be earning much more than I could and in a much shorter period of time. For my part, I had been wanting to work from home building online businesses for quite some time, so it worked out just right. My wife got to take on an exciting new challenge, and I could start working towards achieving my own business and personal goals.

Quoting from Wikipedia again …

“As recently as 25 years ago, such an arrangement with the father staying at home was almost unknown in many places of the world, with traditionally fathers having less contact with their child than the mother, but prevalence is increasing and attitudes are changing. In some places, however, such as in the rural Canadian Prairie Provinces, the practise of women going to work while men stay at home has existed since the 1930s. Despite this, stay-at-home dads still aren’t widespread in much of the world.”

While I am still struggling in some areas with my new role as a househusband and stay-at-home dad, I also see a wonderful and compelling opportunity in the months and years ahead to build deep bonds and a great friendship with my kids, get more involved and participate in their education and character development, help lessen the burden for my wife, and also create long-term financial security for my family all without leaving home.

I plan to share a lot more about the joys and challenges of being a househusband and stay-at-home dad. If you’re in the same or a similar situation, let’s hear from you. Feel free to post your comments and ideas on this blog.

Until next time …

The Lazy HouseHusband

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